Ahhhh, extended weekends are always great... untill you have to go back to work :(
Well, I finally got some stuff done so feel a lot lighter, its amazing how much little things can weigh on oneself without even noticing.
So the Olympics are well underway now and Canada has some medals in swimming aparently... every time the Olympics come around I think any real meaning diminishes beyond existance. This year the big deal is that the event has come 'back to its roots' in Greece, even though the greeks had a difficult time finishing everything, though if a really stiff wind blows I wonder how many buildings will fall over. Really the Olympics were originally supposed for amateur atheletes yet more and more professionals are entering the scene, though I'm happy it enabled Canada to win the Gold medal in Men's hockey a while back.. it really doesn't seem like a real victory.
Whenever money is involved corruption seems to inevitably follow, same thing with politics and business, why should the Olympics be any different? The thing that pisses me off is they try to pretend the Olympics still stand for purity of sport and competition for glory, well actually its just a money festival where atheletes look for endorsements from companies that think plastering their products with 'heroic' gold medal winners get people to buy more. Sadly it actually seems to work, I'm sure there are hardworking amateur atheletes who compete but do they stand a chance against the money put into some of these people who can afford to train 24/7? (Which would be more of a PROffession for them - wouldn't it).

No matter how much I try to ignore things, they keep piling up... while I was working night shift my Bicycle was stolen from the apartment garage. To say this upset me is a bit of an understatement, I don't get to ride as often as I'd like but cycling is one of my favourite things to do, plus that bike cost me more than average at about 700, and I'm not exactly rich.. well downright poor especially with school fees. Its kind of ironic since the reason I got that bike was becaue my previous bike was stolen.. kind of funny hahaha.... . Well maybe its my own fault for trying so hard to procrastinate on doing a lot of stuff, like getting a better lock, and various errand that while might not have prevented my bike from being stolen would have let me feel a little bit better.

So, it kind of just struck me its now halfway through August... I could have sworn that it was April just a few days ago (1999), time seems to be going by in a blur. Either this is some sort of "point of view" phenomenom or its our brains way of saving us from living through the monotony of our own lives.
Well whatever it is the realization of just how much time has passed causes me to remember all the stuff I haven't done and never got around too. Ah enough with that, not much else happening really so thats it for now.

Well another night ended. Today was a fun shift working (cue spooky music) Friday the 13th! Overall it wasn't too bad, yet I still get those really irritating drunks and customers that come in at 3 in the morning. I must remember to relax, only 10 more shifts then off to victoria and the stress of studying... (half-hearted yeah!).
I find it kind of disturbing that I haven't really followed politics in a while, actually the only thing happening apparently is the fight between provinces and the feds about health care. Well there was the Helicopter scandel but haven't heard anything about it recently. The only other big Canadian news is that the venerable Hudson's bay company might be taken over by US discount supertore Target. The Hudson's bay company predates the constitution of Canada and was influencial in building it, if bought over by Target it would mean the last of Canada's large department stores since Eatons kicked the bucket (though I still shudder at thought of Eatons "hip" ads... brown brick...)
The election in america seams to be following the natural mudslide campaigning, not sure if its worth following for anything other than entertainment. Though it just seems to be dragging on and on and on... the Canadian Elections were announced after Bush and held back in July.. so it was a relatively painless experience .. except for having Paul Martin as Prime Minister - I try not to think of it as often as possible. Actually when I think PM its automatically Jean Chretien, Martin hasn't done anything to distinguish himself to the office he now carries. Hopefully his minority government collapses and the Rhino party takes over.

Today I definately feel a bit better, finally got residence confirmed and all that is left is to pay the huge sum of money... sigh. Even though I know lottery tickets are a tax on stupidity it is nice to actually believe one has a chance of winning.. eh.
I find myself amused at work once more.. not so much at the idoiticy of the customers but at some of the pettiness I've seen. Everybody should always take a step back from their day and just reflect on what they've done and what exactly their intentions were.
I could give in to my mischievious side and play things out a bit but that wouldn't go over very well, besides don't really have desire play puppeteer more than once a year. Hmm, guess I'm rambling .. but this is my blog so I can do what I want muhahaha... not that anyone reads it.... damn.

Is it just me or has news taken on an unreal kind of otherworldly feel to it. Whenever I read a newspaper or watch TV news I find that it never really connects that events both horrific and uplifting are taking place around the globe. Though even news in itself has become more about entertaining the audience than giving the facts. Not that I mind really.. but sometimes you wonder if you really need to know that a guy can juggle 5 bowling balls while sewing a shirt.
Of course this leads to the question what do we really need to know? From a survivalist standpoint just eat and sleep. Probably what one "needs" to know depends on what your goals and desires in life are... well maybe thats all bullshit. I suppose its just a choice of either being ignorant and happy or informed and depressed.

Sigh, another day er I mean night of work ended. I increasingly find myself irritated at the various customers and now after some thought I realize its just anger at myself for being in that job. As a bit of background I've always been pretty smart yet have never really applied myself to get anywhere. Now that fact is starting to catch up to me as I look around and find myself stuck somewhere that is as increadible useless to soceity as an SUV. My personal dream would be to in a position that allowed me bring out the best of people instead of dealing with the lower dredges - of course I realize how stupid that is.. truly to be a great person is to acknowledge the best of even the most ill mannered crack-head but like a lot of people I lack the energy to try. Often one tends to think mostly of how they are inconvienced by the stupidity of others rather than look for the humanity that resides in most people. Sometimes for brief moments I look at people and wonder what their 'story' is... who are they really?
You try to ask people who they are and of course they are defined by their name and occupation in life... but that isn't who they are. Personally I think what makes a person is what they feel, what brings them joy or pain. Its kind of difficult to even think about the nature of oneself, to ask the question 'who am I', has plagued many people and will continue for eternity.. whether there is any real answer or if we just need to realize that the question might be an answer in itself doesn't help anyone.
Bah, the fact I actually have time to think of this stuff is a terrible sign of my own stupidity. If I had any brains I would be working hard to make myself into a better person mentally and physically but its soooo much easier to sit by a computer and waste away the minutes... days... years of ones life. Damn that sucks.

I have no idea where this is going, but just felt the need to ponder my own foolishness.

At what point does one lose a battle of common sense and self control? As people ruled by emotion, how do we gauge when the actions we take are the right ones rather than mistakes fueled with irrational anger. I often like to think that I am able to distinguish between nescesasry conflict and stupid ones but its easy to be influenced by emotion you didn't even think related to current situations.
I doubt many people think about how they act on a daily basis but it is interesting to step back and look at the way one has acted in a particular day... we all know the "right" thing to do in most cases but rarely do most people behave the way they themselves want. Take for instance, a drunk lying in a crowed street, how many people would stop and help the unfortunate soul, or walk past and pretend to ignore him.
Unfortunately I find myself in the latter category.. but it doesn't bother me too much since that is what everyone does - its pretty sad to see that acts of compassion are rarities to be admired. Though I seem to be losing track of my original thought, hmm oh yeah... basically why does one make relatively stupid descisions. For myself I think it is out of frustration, so that something that should at worst be mildy annoying turns to be infuriating. It's probably a similar to the reason some people are happy or mean drunks.. does one drink to enjoy the company of others or to forget about the problems life affords.

However that doesn't excuse the consequences of ones own actions, what I often wonder is how do people guage the appropriatness of their actions. Obviously it would be different for a lot of people, some might be following rules or ettiquite, others might just rely on instinct, or maybe its just something you learn through constant interation. Dealing with many different people builds a repetoire of situations and experience in handling them, but ones own perspective determines how they would react based that knowledge... hmm what I think I'm trying to say is that even if two people shared the same experience their own personalities would determine what they learn, and how they will act in the future.